The NZ Herald's latest unbalanced middle class columnist Shelley Bridgeman
Shelley Bridgeman is a mother and free lance writer for the NZ Herald who puts out a weekly column on their website about her banal experiences in the middle class suburban pumpkin patch wasteland she likes to refer to as her life.
While the NZ Herald defines balance as appointing National Party masochists like David Farrar as their online political columnists, they've truly managed to outdo even their limited standards with Shelley Bridgeman's inclusion to their online squawking menagerie.
In her column, 'Not all families are equal', Shelley proclaims with the type of joy reserved for recently freed slaves or trapped miners that she gleefully defied World Health Organisation guidelines and bottle fed her daughter as the guidelines didn't take into account mothers in Remuera and Herne Bay because breast feeding led those mothers to seeking breast implants.
Open mouthed shock.
I'm sorry, too posh to push and too vain to lactate? Shelley goes onto proclaim that she feared advice to lay her daughter on her back would result in a flat head, so she would have her nanny turn the sleeping baby using a notebook to record how long the baby had slept on which side of her head. There are fully automatic weapons less precise than Shelley Bridgeman.
This intellectually flabby jowl of middle class pretension masquerading as parental advice is made offensive due to the rejoicing Shelley seems to revel in by willfully flying in the face of public health campaigns.
Why not just blow cigarette smoke into your kids face while jamming KFC double down burgers down their throat while we're at it? Justifying bottle feeding because you don't want to ruin your figure is honest in a bad way Shelley and rejecting advice on Sudden Unexpected Death of an Infant syndrome by having your nanny turn your sleeping babies head on the hour isn't a solution most people outside the NZ rich list could afford.
After this astounding voyage of self delusion, the NZ Herald had to turn the comments feature off Shelley's blog due to, and I quote, "the number of inappropriate posts". Yeah, people let Shelley know what they thought about her concerns.
She's so the 'daddy I want a golden goose now' type of writer.