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Thursday, January 18, 2007

PRISON BLOG 50


DEATH LIST 2007

2006’s late run of PW Botha and Augusto Pinochet got my hopes up; but I haven’t consulted my Keeper of the Lists yet to see if I was in the money (and there’s still a few days left) – currently 2/10.

Picking the bad guys was a morally appropriate method to enable unguarded enthusiasm towards the death list and I will continue it for 2007. Unfortunately this also means I cant choose good picks like the Iranian woman who won the Nobel Peace Prize for her work - she must be on some hit list. Although I want a decent gender and regional balance it is difficult – as are occupations – most bad guys tend to be current or retired dictators, so I’ve only made one nod towards pinging the abusers of good taste.

After reviewing 2006’s list I’m dropping Yoko Ono and Mirjana Markovic (Mrs. Milosovic) – those battle axes will bloody live forever – they were a waste in so many ways. I think Henry Kissinger will keep on trucking too; give him another year on consulting on the Iraq war before he fucks it up and gets dispirited. One of these years I’ll get Tony Danza down – but not yet. Ditto: Tony Veitch, Tony Blair and anyone else called Tony. Same deal with the American aristocracy, tragedy shall befall one of their dynasties soon – I want to put down “A Kennedy, any Kennedy” on the list, but that’s not precise enough. So here goes:

Death List candidates for 2007:

Ariel Sharon, Israeli fanatic, former PM (brain died 2005)
Kurt Waldheim, Austrian former SS Nazi & UN Sec-Gen.
Suharto, Indonesian former dictator.
Fidel Castro, Cuban El Presidente.
Robert Mugabe, Zimbabwean dictator.
Ian Smith, Rhodesian dictator (dead already?)
Margaret Thatcher, British dictatrix.
Ronnie Biggs, British train robber.
Billy Graham, American religious fanatic/Presidential confidante.
2007 NZ Idol 2nd Runner-up, of a failed attempted suicide.
If Ian Smith is actually already dead then I’ll replace him with the current Algerian dictator Abdelaziz Belkhadem.

DON’T FORGET Tim’s Book and magazine collection for the Prison Library, please send your books and magazines to:
Tim Selwyn
Librarian/Unit 7
Hawkes Bay Prison
Private Bag 1600
Napier, NZ


Tim Selwyn (Editor of Tumeke!)
PRN 60477981
Hawkes Bay Prison
Currently appealing sedition conviction

3 Comments:

At 20/1/07 4:05 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thatcher is a dictator and Castro "El Presidente"?

Move to Cuba when you get Paroled.

P.S. Ian Smith is alive and well in Cape Town

 
At 27/1/07 10:29 am, Blogger bomber said...

...
I love how anyone who doesn't side with the 'Castro is evil' line, they must be a communist, how 1960 of you anon

 
At 28/1/07 9:48 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love how anyone who doesn't side with the 'Bush is evil' line, they must be a facsist, how fundamentalist of you bomber.

 

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